zelfbeeld

She had Lucian Freud?s portrait of Francis Bacon pinned to a noticeboard on the wall in her hall. A postcard, from a gallery or an arty bookshop. I had printed out Francis Bacon?s Study for the Head of Lucian Freud from the internet and stuck it on my bathroom mirror. It was pixellated and the colours weren?t quite right. When I would come home drunk, or stoned, I would squint at it sideways as I swayed on the pitching bathroom floor, and see myself. One day, I got out a blood-red lipstick left behind by a ship that passed out in the night, and obliterated the image. It looked even more like me. I think that?s why it didn?t work out between us.